Behold the Minidoc 9:14 PM

Yay!

This video marks our entry into the glamorous world of Hollywood (ok not quite, but a guy is allowed a little exaggeration right, especially for a first-time filmmaker!).

We made this film as our first assignment in FTV 121, a mini documentary to promote the 'wonders' of Limkokwing University where we study.  And boy, did we explore the 'wonders'.  We scouted high and low, hiked hills and climbed floors, woke up early and stayed back late to find the best way to make this.

In class, Mr. Faizul (our lecturer) reminded us that he saw Anne and I one morning arguing for over an hour near the Plaza entrance, LOL!  We were deciding/debating on the right shot, and couldn't agree on anything.  Worse, we were dry on ideas after 3 days of shooting.

In the end, it all worked out.  Anne did the framing and composition, Fate contributed the creative opening/closing and sound, while I basically yelled at everyone to move their butt.

Oh yeah, credits also to PCG for their minidoc which I watched OVER AND OVER to get inspiration.  Thanks Kar Woon for helping me get the tape at the last minute, Victor and Leeyi for being my housemates (totally unrelated, but wth).  I would also like to thank my Mom and Dad for bringing me into this world, without which this whole thing wouldn't have been possible.

Now enough with the Oscar moment... jeng jeng jeng, the result is below.

I Don't Make Sense Anymore 7:32 AM

Dear blog,

Sometimes I feel so drained, so strained, so tired, so listless.  Sometimes I don't know what I'm doing anymore, that I don't make sense anymore, that what I'm doing is pointless.  Yes, this is an emo post, so deal with it!

I'm rarely satisfied, never happy, hard to please.  I just wish all the expectations of the world could wither away and leave me alone.  I wish I had someone to share it with, that I was't so alone in this, that my presence has purpose and meaning.  I want to matter, but I don't know how, and often end up feeling bad or not good enough.

Dear blog, what is the meaning of life?  A silly question I know, but one I so often ponder in those moments when I stare into space, alone with my thoughts, away from the world.  The challenges seem so insurmountable, and a huge, thick wall keeps me from getting to the other side.  I work so hard, and feel lost in all my effort.

What's the point?  The question has bugged and bogged me lately.  I just want to disappear.  But I also want to rise again.  I think I think too much.  I want to leave.  I want to move, not move on, but move further, to a place I don't know.  I don't know.  But I'm not giving up.  I will find my answers, but I must never stop looking.

Yours sincerely,
John.

"For Chinese Only" 7:39 AM

Some people are unbelievably racist, and that's not okay.

Anne, Fate and I happened to be at Limkowing's Mooncake Festival today, organised by the China Club.  We were tired from filming all day, and decided to rest awhile in the plaza while we packed our stuff.  As we sat down, a burly Chinese guy, one of the organizers, told us the section was reserved "for China Club members only".  Anne and I could have passed off as members, but Fate and Norman, Malay and Kenyan respectively, obviously could not.  He was quite polite, so we decided not to stir up a fuss and moved to the other side of the plaza.

There was a buffet table and the food was free, but alas, it was 'reserved' also.  Anne and I had no trouble getting food, but a black guy was told that it was "for Chinese only".  He was allowed to get drinks though.  Go figure.  To top it off, Fate overheard someone saying "I thought I sent the email that only Chinese people were allowed?"  She must have assumed that non-Chinese people didn't speak English.

Its completely ironic, and quite distasteful, that Limkokwing "The Global University" would have allowed such a thing to happen.  "For Chinese only".  Imagine if we were at the Botswana Independence Day celebration, which takes place next week, and tried to sample their food, only to be told that it was for "Africans only".  What's the point of organizing a Chinese cultural event for Chinese people?  We're in Limkokwing for pete's sake, we should be sharing our culture with the supposedly 'diverse' student community.

I really do wonder what the guy who was chased off might have thought about Chinese people, and I am ashamed of my race.  There was a fight in the plaza today among a group of male black students.  I shudder to imagine that that sort of discrimination might lead to similar strife between the Chinese and the Africans.

I pray it does not.